Showing posts with label Silly Sunday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Silly Sunday. Show all posts

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Silly Sunday #33

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Funny Sayings!
  • Fools rush in where fools have been before.
  • It's called "take home" pay because you can't afford to go anywhere else with it.
  • Success is relative; the greater the success, the more relatives.
  • If at first you succeed, try to hide your astonishment.
  • You must have learned from others' mistakes. You haven't had time to think all those up yourself.
  • People like criticism; just keep it positive and flattering.
  • It's OK to let your mind go blank, but please turn off the sound.
  • Worry kills more people than work because more people worry than work.
  • Middle age is when broadness of the mind, and narrowness of the waist, change places.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Silly Sunday #32

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Innocence!

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it.

The six-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly, 'Good morning Alex.'

'Good morning Pastor,' he replied, still focused on the plaque. 'Pastor, what is this?

The pastor said, 'Well son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.'

Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque. Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear asked, 'Which service, the 8:30 or the 10:30?'

Hat tip: Babs of Beetle's Memories & Ramblings

Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Catch My Words ♥
3. Jim
4. Kibitz Spot
5. Comedy Plus
6. Barb
7. Ann
8. Marg
9. Empress Bee
10. Linda
11. Rajagopalan
12. William K Wallace
13. Judy

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, May 20, 2012

Silly Sunday #31

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

How to recognize when you're getting older!
  • Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt doesn't work.
  • The gleam in your eye is from the sun hitting your bifocals.
  • You feel like the night before, and you haven't been anywhere.
  • Your little black book contains only names ending in M. D.
  • You get winded playing cards.
  • You join a health club and don't go.
  • You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions.
  • You look forward to a dull evening.
  • You need glasses to find your glasses.
  • You turn out the lights for economic rather than romantic reasons.
  • You sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going.
  • Your knees buckle, but your belt won't.
  • Your back goes out more than you do.
  • You have too much room in the house and not enough in the medicine chest.
  • You sink your teeth in a steak and they stay there.
  • YOU WONDER WHY MORE PEOPLE DON'T USE THIS SIZE PRINT.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Kibitz Spot
3. Comedy Plus
4. Woodsterman
5. Jim
6. Barb
7. Marg
8. Judy
9. Empress Bee
10. Rajagopalan
11. Ann
12. Wade
13. Ivanhoe
14. Catch My Words ♥
15. Binky
16. William K Wallace

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, May 13, 2012

Silly Sunday #30

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Mother's Day

A family was having dinner on Mother's Day. For some reason, the mother was unusually quiet. Finally the husband asked what was wrong.

"Nothing," said the woman.

Not buying it, he asked again.

"Seriously, what's wrong?"

"Do you really want to know? Well, I'll tell you. I have cooked and cleaned and fed the kids for fifteen years and on Mother's Day, you don't even tell me so much as "thank you."

"Why should I?" he said. "Not once in fifteen years have I gotten a Father's Day gift."

"Yes," she said, "but I'm their real mother."

Hat tip: Phil of Phils Phun

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Silly Sunday #29

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Top 15 things that you will never hear a Southern man say:


15. When I retire, I'm movin' up north.

14. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

13. Duct tape won't fix that.

12. Come to think of it, I'll have a white wine instead of a beer.

11. We don't keep firearms in this house.

10. You can't feed that to the dog.

9. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

8. Rastling is fake.

7. We're vegetarians.

6. Do you think my gut is too big?

5. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy..

4. Honey, we don't need another dog.

3. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

2. Give me the small bag of barbecue pork rinds.

1. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

Hat tip: My Alabama buddies ♥♥Dave and Linda♥♥
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Chinmay
2. bethere2day
3. Catch My Words ♥
4. Kibitz Spot
5. Comedy Plus
6. Woodsterman
7. Ron Russell
8. Jim
9. Barb
10. Traveling Bells
11. Marg
12. Empress Bee
13. Silverthoughts2
14. Judy
15. Binky
16. Reese

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, April 29, 2012

Silly Sunday #28

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Ten Funny Definitions To Brighten Sunday
  1. Accountant - someone you hire to explain that you didn't make the money you did.
  2. Consciousness - the time between naps.
  3. Justice - a decision in your favor.
  4. Paradox - two physicians.
  5. Court of law - the place where a suit is pressed and a man can be taken to the cleaners.
  6. Flattery - an insult in gift wrapping.
  7. Capitalism - the survival of the fattest.
  8. A consultant is a person who borrows your watch, tells you what time it is, pockets the watch, and sends you a bill for it.
  9. A born loser: Somebody who calls the telephone number that's scrawled in lipstick on the phone booth wall and his wife answers.
  10. Alimony - the cost of loving.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Chinmay
3. Woodsterman
4. Kibitz Spot
5. Comdey Plus
6. Barb
7. Rajagopalan
8. Marg
9. Traveling Bells
10. Ann
11. Judy
12. Rocks
13. William K Wallace

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, April 22, 2012

Silly Sunday #27

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Gomer

The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so Gomer - who was not exactly the sharpest nail in the bucket went in to try out for the job.

"Okay," the sheriff drawled, "Gomer, what is 1 and 1?"

"11" he replied.

The sheriff thought to himself, "That's not what I meant, but he's right."

"What two days of the week start with the letter 'T'?"

"Today and tomorrow."

He was again surprised that Gomer supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.

"Now Gomer, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?"

Gomer looked a little surprised himself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, "I don't know."

"Well, why don't you go home and work on that one for a while?"

So, Gomer wandered over to the pool hall where his pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview.

Gomer was exultant. "It went great! First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!"
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Woodsterman
2. Comedy Plus
3. Kibitz Spot
4. George
5. Catch My Words ♥
6. Chinmay
7. Stevebethere
8. Empress Bee
9. Traveling Bells
10. Marg
11. Rajagopalan
12. Bearman
13. Ecl Tan
14. Ann
15. Judy
16. Stephen Hayes
17. Ivana
18. Ron Russell
19. Binky
20. Rocks

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, April 15, 2012

Silly Sunday #26

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Fun Facts - Part III

According to U.S. FDA standards, 1 cup of orange juice is allowed to contain 10 fruit fly eggs, but only 2 maggots.

According to U.S. laws, a beer commercial can never show a person actually drinking beer.

Acorns were used as a coffee substitute during the American Civil War.

Actor Mark Wahlberg has a third nipple!

Actor Val Kilmer grew up on Roy Rogers' ranch.

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

All clams start out as males; some decide to become females at some point in their lives.

All Humans Are 99.9% Genetically Identical and 98.4% of human genes are the same as the genes of a chimpanzee.

All major league baseball umpires must wear black underwear while on the job!

All of the Earth's continents are wider at the north than in the south - and nobody knows why.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. SUGAR
2. bethere2day
3. Catch My Words ♥
4. Kibitz Spot
5. Comedy Plus
6. Woodsterman
7. Barb
8. Marg
9. Traveling Bells
10. Rajagopalan
11. Empress Bee
12. Jodi's Journey
13. Stephen Hayes
14. Judy
15. Ann
16. Bearman
17. Katherine
18. Jim
19. Silver Thoughts
20. William K Wallace

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, April 8, 2012

Silly Sunday #25

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

All I Need to Know About Life
I Learned from the Easter Bunny

Don't put all of your eggs in one basket.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
Some body parts should be floppy.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.
The grass is always greener in someone else's basket.
An Easter bonnet can tame even the wildest hare.
To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey!
Happy Easter!

Silly Sunday Participants
1. Chinmay
2. Traveling Bells
3. Kibitz Spot
4. Comedy Plus
5. Woodsterman
6. Catch My Words ♥
7. Jim
8. Barb
9. Lydia
10. Empress Bee
11. Marg
12. Ann
13. Ron Russell
14. Judy
15. Jim
16. stevebethere

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, April 1, 2012

Silly Sunday #24

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Fishing Trip

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back; now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is
terrible."

My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started.

Hat tip: Dave and Linda from Alabama

Silly Sunday Participants
1. Catch My Words ♥
2. Woodsterman
3. Comedy Plus
4. Kibitz Spot
5. Chinmay
6. Ron Russell
7. Barb
8. Stevebethere
9. Traveling Bells
10. Marg
11. Empress Bee
12. Rajagopalan
13. Mike
14. Stephen Hayes
15. William K Wallace
16. Jodi's Journey
17. Binky
18. Judy
19. Ron Russell
20. Jim

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, March 25, 2012

Silly Sunday #23

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, co-hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes and Sandee of Comedy Plus. Rhonda is on a big adventure traveling the world until December 2, 2012. For more information about Silly Sunday click HERE.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Spunky Doodle
3. Kibitz Spot
4. Comedy Plus
5. Woodsterman
6. Catch My Words ♥
7. Barb
8. Traveling Bells
9. Marg
10. Empress Bee
11. William K Wallace
12. Judy
13. Binky
14. Ann
15. Jim

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, March 18, 2012

Silly Sunday #22

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

North Carolina

A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.

A passerby studied the scene as he drove by, and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was.

The man replied, "I got a flat tahr."

The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"

The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand it neither."

Hat tip: Dave and Linda from Alabama
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Barb
3. Marg
4. Ann
5. Empress Bee
6. Traveling Bells
7. Laugh Quotes
8. Judy
9. Tony McGurk
10. Woodsterman
11. Jim
12. Binky
13. William K Wallace
14. Bearman

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, March 11, 2012

Silly Sunday #21

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Why Women are Happier than Men
  1. Aren't forced to compensate for their fathers' lack of childhood sports skills every Saturday morning throughout their formative years.

  2. Can sit and read every time they go to the bathroom.

  3. Can spend time alone with Catholic priests, Boy Scout leaders, and Baptist Youth ministers without feeling sexually threatened.

  4. Don't worry about going bald.

  5. Don't have to constantly answer "What are you gonna be when you grow up?" shortly after their third birthday.

  6. Don't have to run a super-sharp piece of metal over their facial epidermal layer each and every morning of their adult lives.

  7. Can bludgeon someone to death with a baseball bat and then get off scot-free by claiming a "hormonal imbalance."

  8. Can commit cold-blooded murder and not only get off scot-free, but end up with a book deal and an appearance on Oprah merely by mentioning "years of violent spousal abuse."

  9. Know exactly what to do when a child is sick.

  10. Don't have a freaky, semi-oedipal relationship with their overbearing mothers.

  11. Don't ever have to spit.

  12. Don't ever have to hold one nostril shut while blowing a huge loogie out the other.

  13. Have an astute, innate sense of when to change underwear before it becomes a Petri Dish for bacteria development.

  14. Never pull a back muscle screaming at the television during a sports event.

  15. Don't have to worry about which family member will inherit and care for their collection of baseball caps.

  16. Never lose six hours on a Saturday morning watching fishing shows on OLN.

  17. Can tell their doctors anything.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Laugh Quotes
3. Barb
4. Tony McGurk
5. Ann
6. Empress Bee
7. Marg
8. Stephen Hayes
9. Judy
10. Comedy Plus
11. Jim
12. Binky
13. Silver Thoughts
14. Traveling Bells

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, March 4, 2012

Silly Sunday #20

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Male Dining

A group of 15-year old boys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Dairy Queen next to the Ocean View restaurant because they only had $6.00 between them and Jennie Johnson, the cute girl in Social Studies, lived on that street and they might see her and they can ride their bikes there.

Ten years later, the group of 25-year-old guys discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the beer was cheap, they had free snacks, the band was good, there was no cover, and there were lots of cute girls.

Ten years later, at 35 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the booze was good, it was right near the gym, and if they went late enough, there wouldn't be too many whiny little kids.

Ten years later, at 45 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the martinis were big and the waitresses had nice boobs and wore tight pants.

Ten years later, at 55 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the prices were reasonable, the wine list was good, and fish is good for your cholesterol.

Ten years later, at 65 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the lighting was good and they have an early bird special.

Ten years later, at 75 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food was not too spicy and the restaurant was handicapped accessible.

Ten years later, at 85 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. It was agreed they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.

Hat tip: ♥♥Hubby♥♥
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. Laugh Quotes
3. Sugar
4. Barb
5. Marg
6. Traveling Bells
7. Empress Bee
8. Stephen Hayes
9. Jean
10. Judy
11. Rocks
12. Mike
13. Jim
14. Ann
15. Silver Thoughts
16. Bearman
17. Skunkfeathers

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, February 26, 2012

Silly Sunday #19

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Proverbs - Part II

A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading these keep in mind that these are first graders...

Where there's smoke there's - pollution.

Happy the bride who - gets all the presents.

A penny saved is - not much.

Two's company, three's - the Musketeers.

Don't put off till tomorrow what - you put on to go to bed.

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and... you have to blow your nose.

There are none so blind as - Stevie Wonder.

Children should be seen and not - spanked or grounded.

If at first you don't succeed - get new batteries.

You get out of something only what you - see in the picture on the box.

When the blind leadeth the blind - get out of the way.

And the favorite: Better late than - pregnant!!!!
Silly Sunday Participants
1. bethere2day
2. da Dude
3. Laugh Quotes
4. Ann
5. Sugar
6. Marg
7. Empress Bee
8. Rajagopalan
9. Barb
10. Traveling Bells
11. Stephen Hayes
12. Jean
13. Sucen
14. Binky
15. Jim

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, February 19, 2012

Silly Sunday #18

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Instructions for giving your cat a pill:

1. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with lef hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of 10.

4. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

5. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, holding front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold cat's head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

6. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

7. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with its head just visible from below spouse's armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force cat's mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

8. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

9. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

10. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

11. Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

12. Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Force cat's mouth open with small spanner. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 1/2 pint of water down throat to wash pill down.

13. Get spouse to drive you to emergency room; sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Stop by furniture shop on way home to order new table.

14. Arrange for vet to make a house call.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Comedy Plus
2. da Dude
3. Barb
4. stevebethere
5. Empress Bee
6. Rajagopalan
7. Marg
8. Sugar
9. Jim
10. Laugh Quotes
11. Babs
12. Ann
13. Rocks
14. Traveling Bells

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, January 15, 2012

Silly Sunday #17

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Absent-minded Professor

One morning as Professor Jones was leaving for the university his wife told her absent-minded husband, "Don't forget we are moving today. If you come to this house this afternoon it will be empty." Predictably, he didn't remember until he found the house vacated that afternoon.

He mumbled to himself, "And where was it we were moving to?" He went out in front of the house and asked a little girl, "Did you see a moving van here today, little girl?"

"Yes," she replied.

"Would you know which way it went?"

She looked up at him and said, "Yes, Daddy, I'll show you."

Hat tip: Phil of Phils Phun
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Comedy Plus
2. Barb
3. Rhonda
4. Kibitz Spot
5. stevebethere
6. Ann
7. Marg
8. Stephen Hayes
9. Judy
10. Jim
11. Angel
12. Wade
13. Jean
14. Rocks
15. Binky
16. Traveling Bells

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, January 8, 2012

Silly Sunday #16

Are you funny? If so, please join in at Silly Sunday, hosted by Rhonda of Laugh Quotes.

The rules are simple:
  • Post anything funny or silly on your blog.
  • Add your link on the Silly Sunday linky below.
  • If you want more laughs – read some of the other Silly Sunday posts.
Silly Sunday is your chance to share a favorite joke, silly picture, funny quote, amusing anecdote, creative comic or anything which made you smile today – and get a bit more traffic to your blog.

Wisdom From Senior Citizens

1. I started with nothing. I still have most of it.

2. When did my wild oats turn to prunes and all bran?

3. I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.

5. All reports are in. Life is now officially unfair.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

9. The first rule of holes: if you are in one, stop digging.

10. I tried to get a life once, but they told me they were out of stock.

11. I went to school to become a wit, only got halfway though.

12. It was so different before everything changed.

13. Some day's you're the dog, and some day's you're the hydrant.

14. Nostalgia isn't what it use to be.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Kibitz Spot
2. Laugh Quotes
3. bethere2day
4. Jim
5. Marg
6. Ann
7. Jean
8. Bearman
9. Barb
10. Jodi
11. Empress Bee
12. Judy
13. Traveling Bells
14. Stephen Hayes
15. Ivanhoe
16. Mike
17. William K Wallace

Learn more about Silly Sunday here.

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Sunday, December 18, 2011

Silly Sunday #15

Rhonda of Laugh Quotes has a meme called Silly Sunday. Go HERE for the simple rules.

On Friday I did a post on Stupid People wherein most everyone that commented added their own favorite saying(s). Feel free to do so again today.

  • A few crumbs short of a crouton.
  • A few clowns short of a circus.
  • A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
  • An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
  • A few beers short of a six-pack.
  • A few peas short of a casserole.
  • The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.
  • One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
  • One taco short of a combination plate.
  • A few feathers short of a whole duck.
Silly Sunday Participants
1. Sandee
2. Marg
3. stevebethere
4. Barb
5. Judy
6. Empress Bee
7. Mike
8. Stephen Hayes
9. Grace
10. Lost
11. Sucen